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Monday, April 12, 2010

The Light

I discovered something odd about me yesterday. (What else is new?) The ear ringing, now a constant issue, is affected by the light coming in my left eye. Let me explain.

Yesterday MJ and I were trying to enjoy our last day off. My brain shocks were detonating as usual. My head buzzed with ringing ears. I checked my vision by closing one eye, then the other (something I do regularly). The vision is holding up fine, but I noticed something else: the pitch of the ear ringing did an upward half-step glissando every time I closed my left eye. I did this many times to confirm.

"Maybe the facial muscles alter something in your inner ear and this causes the pitch to change," MJ said.

We had paused the TV—The Masters, mind you—and this meant there was something serious to discuss.

I replied, "Maybe, but let me try something." I kept my face completely still. Using the most minimum energy I could, I closed my left eye and then opened it.

The same pitch change happened with the ear ringing. I tried several more times and it was always the same.

"It still could be just a tiny facial muscle," MJ said.

"I'll try something else," I said. Now, I did not move my face at all. Keeping completely still, I moved my hand over my left eye, blocking the light. SAME PITCH CHANGE. The same half-step glissando, up when the light was blocked, down when the light came back in. I moved my hand on and off my eye quickly. DO-RE-DO-RE-DO-RE-DO.

It was the light.

Later, during the sunset, the light flashing into my left eye disrupted something deep in my head. I simply could not take the light and I wished I had my eyepatch with me. I sat with my hand over my left eye.

This morning, there is now something funky with my left knee. Something in the joint, as if I can't make it do what I want. Stairs are difficult but not impossible. Just slow.

"Move, leg!" I implore. A second later, my left leg obeys. It's just a strange delay where my body won't quite do what I want it to. Something is starting to happen, but I don't know what it is.

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